Friday, June 13, 2008

Truths, half-truths and lies

Is it me or are more and more healthy women having weird, difficult, problematic, or downright scary births. My pregnancy was a breeze. I didn't have much sickness, I gained 25 pounds (of which, I have kept because don't like to get rid of things), but man, was labor awful.

I was in labor for 31 hours. And every single thing they scared me with in birthing class happened to me. Not kidding. A sampling: back labor, not progressing, had to have my water broken, had to put the spring-y thin-y in Owen's head, I could go on, but I do hope to eat today. It was just hideous. I think I remember asking my husband if he would be kind enough to smother me with my body pillow, which he declined and I of course, I just continued sobbing.

Finally, I had an emergency c-section. Which is ironic because upon first meeting my doctor, I asked for a scheduled one. Seems to me, everyone would have saved a lot of time had these people just listened to me. This is a recurring theme.

But alas, I had an emergency c because Owen had determined that the umbilical chord should come out first. He must have looked at that thing and said, sakes alive, I am going to need this thingy out there!

Wild, I know, but like 10 other women I am friends with had some other crazy-ass story about their emergency c-section, or their infection afterward, or the baby had problems. Is it me, or is the medical community just blowing sunshine up our expanding asses when we have babies? They always make you think that these oddities are simply that, uncommon occurrences. Well, from my circle of friends, we are a bunch of oddities. Either that, or we are being lied to about what is normal. Or it is all that crack we smoked...

(really, no one I know actually smokes crack)

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