It really does get easier

When our boy was born and the subsequent months that made up the first year, I battled post-partem depressed pretty badly. I had a terrible time adjusting to this new person in my home and the addition to the very tightly guarded membership to the Stracey (steve and tracey) club. I was certain that it would be hard and would never let up. I had lost all faith that I could be a mom and enjoy it.

Many, many people including the wonderful woman who treated my depression said over and over again it will get better and easier, just cut yourself some slack (note: I never cut myself any slack, ever, seriously, ask Steve). Slack cutting is just not one of my strong suits. Either way, I got through it, however tenuously I would hang on some days.

And then today. Today, we got to so something so unbelievable normal. Something from our old life that we really loved doing (no, not smoking!). We went for a hike. In the woods. With Owen. He actually walked on a trail with us. I am pretty sure it was a glimpse into what heaven could be like, except for the million other people with the same idea crowding the trail...and all the people smoking as they hiked (honestly, you know you are in Ohio when people smoke and hike). But, still, a hike, together. It was awesome and it is getting easier and easier...plus, I lost 8 pounds over the last three weeks, so I am kinda on a roll. I have a lot more to lose, but, 8 is a real beginning!

It is a wonder to focus on so little beyond own well-being and that of my family. It really does make it easier to do the things I have been ignoring for the last two years.